Gratitude.

A few things I am grateful for.

1.Skee ball! Some time in my mid-20′s I lost the ability to spin around. Technically I can still spin myself about, but only if I wish to spend the rest of the day prone, watching the room spin while I vomit up my body weight in cotton candy and Flaky Jakes. And those two delicacies would be hurtling out of my person because the most obvious place to spin yourself around is at the Fair! And spin I did used to. I was conducting enough research to finish my seminal work “The Tilt-a-Whirl and You: finding your zen” when cruel genetics and age kicked in. But I was not prepared to give up the fair, so I searched around until one day I found this:

Hands on your balls, ladies!

Skee Ball saved me. It’s that simple. So I am grateful for Skee. Less grateful for the nine-fingered angry man who ran the Skee. He’d take your dollars with  unconcealed hostility, possibly bitter that he was rounding out the last decade of his life as the Skee Man.  And even less so for the carny who gave me “The Daughter of Fanny Hill” in place of a small prize. To answer your questions, yes I did read it, and no, he didn’t have a glass eye – he just couldn’t focus the right one.

2. Cheese. Thank you World for cheese, except for gouda. I just don’t get gouda.  All other cheeses are welcome.*

3. The Perfection That Is Tom Selleck. He doesn’t try, he just is. Suck it, gents, because you will never top him.

And there they are: three things for which I am quite grateful.  Should this have inspired you to be grateful for something, never forget that Wry & Ginger has a card for every mood, provided the mood is primarily bitter. But we also  do gratitude.

Gratitude Cards from W&G

In a fashion.

*As everyone insists on referring to goat cheese by its poncy name “Chevre” and won’t just call it cheese, I have reassigned it to a separate food category. The crap category. It no longer counts. Tres dommage, France.

**Yes, I see how #3 may have come off as slightly dirty. Shame on you